Every day I wade through:

• Clickbait that buried the actual news in paragraph 47

• PR speak that says nothing with maximum words

• Those slideshow articles designed by someone who clearly hates humanity

• Auto-play videos that make me want to commit arson

So you get:

• Just the stuff that matters, zero fluff

• Actual context from someone who remembers what happened last week

• The unhinged commentary your friends would provide if they weren't normal

Think of me as that friend who watches all the trash TV and texts you the good parts. Except it's genre news. And I have opinions. So many opinions.

Your inbox. My crippling need to know everything. Once a day.

Subscribe before my therapist convinces me this is unhealthy.