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Hey Nerds,
Today's sponsor is Pacaso. They sell you 1/8th of a luxury vacation home because apparently owning a WHOLE house is so 2019. Look, I can't even afford 1/8th of a studio apartment, but they're keeping my electricity on this month, so please just click the link? Just click it. For the love of all that is holy, click it. My credit card is crying.
[Link at bottom of newsletter]
IN THIS ISSUE:
Superman and Lex Luthor team up in sequel
Harry Potter fanfiction sells for $3 million
Bryan Fuller wants Zendaya as Clarice Starling which is... a choice
...and more
SUPERMAN AND LEX LUTHOR TEAM UP LIKE A DIVORCED COUPLE AT THEIR KID'S WEDDING
James Gunn told Howard Stern that Man of Tomorrow is about Superman and Lex having to work together against a "much, much bigger threat."
It's "as much a Lex movie as it is a Superman movie" which is like saying your salad is as much bacon as it is lettuce. One of these things is supposed to be the main thing, James. Pick a lane.
This is the plot of every buddy cop movie. They're gonna bicker. They're gonna save the world. Lex will betray Superman at the end because scorpions and frogs or whatever. April 2026 production, July 2027 release.
HARRY POTTER FANFICTION SELLS FOR THREE MILLION ACTUAL DOLLARS
Someone named SenLinYu sold their Dramione fanfic "Alchemised" to Legendary for over $3 million.
Their previous work "Manacled" got 10 million views on AO3 which is the site where people write about Sherlock and Watson doing... things. And now they have Hollywood money. Meanwhile I wrote 50,000 words about my emotional breakdown during COVID and my therapist said "that's nice" and charged me $200.
You know what? Good for them. I'm not bitter. I'm just gonna sit here thinking about how someone's Hogwarts horny jail fiction is worth more than most people's houses. Including mine. Because I don't have a house. Because I write newsletters instead of profitable wizard erotica.
BRYAN FULLER WANTS ZENDAYA AS CLARICE STARLING (UM, OK?)
Fuller told ScreenRant his "dream project" is Silence of the Lambs with Mads Mikkelsen and Zendaya as Clarice Starling.
This is like casting me as Batman. Could it happen? Technically. Should it? My ex kept saying I need to stop fantasizing about being Batman (that's partly why we broke up) but that's not the point. The point is Bryan Fuller's out here dream-casting like he's playing Hollywood Mad Libs. "Famous young actress" plus "cannibal psychiatrist" equals... profit? Art? I genuinely don't know anymore.
FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S 2 STILL PG-13 DESPITE PROMISES
The sequel got rated PG-13 even though Matthew Lillard said they listened to fans wanting more gore.
They lied. Or they listened and decided "nah." Same rating as the first one. December 5, 2025 release for another sanitized pizza robot nightmare. This is like ordering spicy food and getting ketchup. It's technically red. Technically has tomatoes. But it's not what you wanted and everyone knows it.
QUICK HITS BECAUSE TIME IS A CONSTRUCT
DC cancels Red Hood after ONE issue because the writer made inappropriate comments about a real-world tragedy. Comics drama continues to be exhausting.
Star Wars: Visions Season 3 - October 29. Nine anime studios making Star Wars shorts. Because regular Star Wars wasn't confusing enough.
Sigourney Weaver confirms Pedro Pascal is in the Mandalorian movie like that was ever in question. May 22, 2026. He's under the helmet. Or not. Who knows.
How to Train Your Dragon live-action hits Peacock October 10. Now I can watch both versions simultaneously and catalog every single inconsistency like a normal person.
Rings of Power Season 3 teaser shows Narsil. The sword. It's important apparently. No release date because time is meaningless in Middle-earth.
CALENDAR
October 10, 2025 - Dragon live-action on Peacock
October 29, 2025 - Star Wars anime returns
December 5, 2025 - Freddy's stays child-friendly
May 22, 2026 - Mandalorian definitely has Pedro
July 9, 2027 - Superman/Lex buddy comedy
Got feelings about any of this?
Hit me up on Bluesky where I'm writing my own fanfiction about sentient bread falling in love with a toaster.
-Zak
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