Instagram Leaks + Hollywood Lies

This morning hit me like a pizza delivery guy who can't find your apartment - unexpected, frustrating, and somehow my fault. Tried to make breakfast. The toaster and I had a disagreement about what "medium brown" means. The toaster won by setting off the smoke alarm. Now my breakfast is carbon and my neighbors think I can't be trusted with basic appliances. They're right. I can't. I once burned water. WATER. “How?” Still unclear.

IN THIS ISSUE:

Krysten Ritter is the one who leaked the Daredevil: Born Again Season 2 trailer on her Instagram after the NYCC panel. The footage shows Jessica Jones returning, Matthew Lillard joining the cast, and premieres March 2026 on Disney+.

So, the woman who played a super-powered detective for three seasons apparently couldn't detect that posting unreleased Marvel content might be a problem? I once accidentally posted my credit card number on Twitter thinking it was a DM. Had to get a new card. And a new identity. Well, just the card, but I THOUGHT about the identity thing.

Andy and Barbara Muschietti's IT: Welcome to Derry debuts October 26 on HBO Max with nine episodes. They specifically said they "wanted to raise the bar higher in terms of shock value" with an opening scene designed to show "nothing is safe."

Uh the original had a clown eating children. EATING CHILDREN. What's the escalation here? Actually no, don't tell me. I'm still recovering from the time I googled "why does my eye twitch" and ended up convinced I had seventeen terminal illnesses. WebMD said I was already dead. The clown eating children was somehow less traumatic than that Tuesday afternoon spiral.

James Gunn told Rolling Stone that Swamp Thing remains in development despite director James Mangold signing with Paramount. Gunn said "We'll see what happens" and confirmed they've talked, adding Mangold is "still invested."

You know what else I'm still invested in? My gym membership from 2019. Haven't been once. They still charge me. I still pay. It's a relationship built on mutual disappointment. That's probably how Mangold feels about Swamp Thing. Just sitting there. Existing. Technically alive but not really.

DC announced this as part of their "Gods and Monsters" chapter which sounds like what I call my dating history.

Marvel revealed VisionQuest's cast at NYCC including actors playing D.U.M.-E, J.A.R.V.I.S., F.R.I.D.A.Y., E.D.I.T.H., and Ultron (James Spader returns). The WandaVision trilogy concludes on Disney+ in 2026.

They got someone named Henry Lewis to play D.U.M.-E, which is literally just a robot arm. A human playing a robot arm. I once played a tree in a school play. Got cut from the production for overacting. “How do you overact as a tree?” Apparently by swaying too enthusiastically. The drama teacher said I was "making it about me." It was a tree.